To have friends a person must give of themselves. Compliments will not get and retain friends. The wise man said, “A friend loveth at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.” When hard times come, we find our true friends.
Emerson defined a friend as “a person with whom I may be sincere. Before him I may think aloud.” Someone else has said:
A friend is one who needs us and one whom we need. Around us may be many whose companionship we enjoy, but were they suddenly to drop out of their places, there would be no soreness, no sense of deprivation, no lack of comfort. We do not need them; neither do they need us. A friend is one to whom we cling, though many leagues of space separate us. Though days pass with no sight of their face or word from their pen, we know our friend loves us and that when we meet again we will be on the same old terms: we shall begin where we left off. A friend is one in whom we can confide. The secret chambers of our soul open to their touch on the latch.
To have and hold friends we must (1) Be friendly (Proverbs 18:24), (2) Be helpful in times of trouble (Proverbs 17:17), (3) Learn to associate with all classes of people (Philippians 2:3), (4) Be unselfish (Philippians 2:4), (5) Be tolerant (Colossians 3:13), (6) Be honest, sincere, truthful (Romans 13:13) and (7) Be stable (James 1:8).
An unknown poet said:
I love you not only for what you are, but for what I am when I am with you. I love you not only for what you are making of yourself, but for what you are making of me. I love you for that part of me that you bring out. I love you for ignoring the possibility of the fool in me, and laying hold of the possibility of good… You have done it just by being yourself. Perhaps this is what a friend means after all.
God help us to make friends, but above all, be a friend (Proverbs 18:24).
