Hello bro. Rushmore; I’m having to restudy the subject of elders who have children who have left home and live elsewhere and are now unfaithful to the Lord. The elder and his family have conducted themselves properly. Thanks, Dave Dugan, Gospel Preacher, Lawton, Ok.
Scripture records the qualifications necessary for men to possess before they can be considered for appointment as elders in any congregation (1 Timothy 3:1-7; Titus 1:5-9). The latter has this to say about an elder’s children. “… having faithful children not accused of riot or unruly” (Titus 1:6). Yet, the context in which those children, among the qualifications of elders, is addressed is revealed in the former passage.
“One that ruleth well his own house, having his children in subjection with all gravity; (For if a man know not how to rule his own house, how shall he take care of the church of God?)” (1 Timothy 3:4-5).
It is obvious from these Scriptures that in order for men to qualify for selection as elders (as far as biblical references to their children), they must have kept their families under control, having Christian children who, incidentally, acted like Christians ought to conduct themselves. Those comprising his family were obedient Christians, demonstrating their Christianity generally and with respect to the home over which their father was head.
The question before us presently is whether an elder’s adult children who no longer live in his home must continue to be faithful Christians in order for an elder to remain an elder. The Scriptures say nothing that directly touches on this question. Mothers and fathers have much less control over their grown children. One’s adult children have freewill and may opt to do as they please, irrespective of their upbringing. It is often the case that children will adhere to the training of their earlier years (Proverbs 22:6), or if they depart from it, they will eventually return. However, whatever courses our adult children pursue are ultimately their responsibility and doing.
The only passage of which I am aware that involves challenging an elder pertains to accusations regarding sins in his life.
“Against an elder receive not an accusation, but before two or three witnesses. Them that sin rebuke before all, that others also may fear” (1 Timothy 5:19-20).
As far as Scripture is concerned, that one or more of an elder’s adult children become unfaithful does not necessarily disqualify him from being an elder. Sin in the life of an elder is a different matter. However, especially if all of an elder’s children became unfaithful, one might suspect that something was amiss while the children were yet in the home under the elder’s control and responsibility. Under these circumstances, then, either an elder or the congregation that he serves might deem it best that he no longer serve as an elder.
The question before us is not specifically addressed in Scripture. Any decisions resulting from such a scenario, by an elder or the congregation he serves, then, would be a matter of human judgment.
